just a blurp.....

Sunday was a rocky day for me emotionally. Totally unplanned I might add. Nick and I arose early Sunday morning, had coffee, and headed out the door for church. I'm teaching Sunday school again, first grade through third, so it's pretty fun for me. After church we had a gathering at out pastors house. The group consisted of several young married couples. "Young" referring to every one's age, not their relational status. Everyone has children. Nick and I are the only ones without children. Most of the time my mind tends to briefly gravitate towards the dream of having a family of our own, but I quickly bounce back, realizing it's just not time yet. But Sunday, my heart grew heavy. The group was brought together this past sunday so the pastors could gain insight and feedback as to how the church can better minister to young families and couples in our church and community. We used to meet as a group two Sundays a month and view a marriage video followed by a discussion. We also had several fun fellowships together as a group. The focus was always on our marriages. The children would obviously come up, and were always present at the different functions, but the purpose of the group was never mainly the children. This time around the conversation was all about the kids. I understand that children are a huge part of our lives, and that once you have kids, your world tends to revolve around them. I just felt discouraged because instead of seeking to grow our individual lives and relationships through this ministry, it seemed like everyone was more interested in a play group type of group, or a growing kids Gods way class. Don't get me wrong, i do think nick and i would benefit from taking a class to learn how to rear our children, but its just hard at times because we haven't been blessed with a child yet. The the focus turned towards us at one point when someone asks,"how can we better serve the couples in our community who do not have children"? Then someone says, "i do hope you two don't feel left out", or something along those lines.... Well of course we feel left out at times, hello! Its no ones fault we feel left out, we just are not the norm for our age bracket. All this griping to say, sometimes its just so hard....