Everything has happened so fast. Its so hard to believe we are going to have a baby in the house in only 11 weeks or so. It seems like just yesterday i was broken at the realization i could not bear children of my own. It seems like just yesterday my heart broke again as we were turned down at adopting from china. then, just when we are all set to go with adopting from Korea, actually waiting for our referral.... possibly expecting a baby in spring of 09.... we find out we are pregnant!!! Don't get me wrong, i am thrilled at the thought of having this little girl:) The idea of being pregnant still boggles my mind! There is a part of me though that is disappointed about being torn off the Korean list. i really am excited about that little punky too! I have still kept up with the Korean blog and as i peered at the list today, they are already into November 07! This means we would have received our referral and our baby would have been here possibly the same time as this baby girl or shortly after. Is it weird that i feel grieved about a baby that was never officially mine? all those tears of sorrow over not being able to conceive and now i am pregnant and grieving over our being skipped over in the referral department! I don't want to give off the impression that i am ungrateful for the blessing God has given us here in being pregnant with our daughter. I guess i just don't understand his plan sometimes.
All is well.....
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2 comments:
I think it is totally ok that you are bummed about being taken off the Korea waiting list.
I also think that your pregnancy hormones are in full gear! ;)
Can/will you do a Korean adoption down the road?
I miss ya, girl!
How are you feeling?? How is baby treating you??
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